Since around the new year, I’ve been working on a life-organizing project to help me become a better person. Like all my favorite personal schemes, it’s ambitious and multi-faceted and is made up of all sorts of maps and charts and concept bubbles and lists. I hope to share the project here shortly, but it’s hit a little snag.
I am committed to just too many spheres of life in which I don’t just want to sail by, but instead be great. It’s all too much, it’s unhealthy, and I need to recognize that part of growing up means establishing priorities for who one wants to be. But how?
Here are all the things I want to be:
-A good father
-A good partner
-A good family member to my Guatemalan family
-A good friend
-A good revolutionary organizer
-A good teacher
-A good school leader
-A good writer
-A good housemate
-A good gamer
-A good game designer
-In good health
I can’t be great and innovative all the time in all of these different areas of life and, as I get older, it’s taking a heavy toll to constantly expect across-the-board greatness for myself and then fall way short–telling myself that I still have time to fix the flaws.
What does it look like to make peace with being just okay in some areas of life, and then really hone in on those areas where I really want to show my stuff? And if I do that, how can my 4.0 gpa super-achiever sense of identity let myself slide? Can I? I shiver. I don’t know.